Drawing Closer

During today's worship while we were singing "I'm searching for you, draw me closer to you, I need your presence" (which I sang wholeheartedly because that's been my most intense prayer lately) God was asking me, "How much time do you actually take to draw close to me? How much room do you really make to search for me, to come close?" I was a bit amazed about that because I DO pray a lot, actually most of the time, whatever I do. So God went on, reminding me of the songs we were singing at the beginning of the service in which we proclaimed that He is great, almighty, ruler of the world. And again I was puzzled that God would pick at that because I had also sung these songs with all my heart. So He asked me, "When was the last time you proclaimed that I am the Almighty just for my sake and without wanting me to fix one of your problems?" Well...

I had the impression that that word was not olny for me alone, but that it was actually also one for the congregation. The amazing thing was that not only I got that word but that two other women and one guy also got impressions that said very much the same. And guess what the sermon was about: Searching God in your all day life.

I've been stuck lately in whining about things that have not yet come. That I can't see God's glory in that country, that everything is so slow, that there is not only no revival here but that church actually feels close dead. That I am AGAIN stuck in a job I just don't like (I'm really wondering how much molding my character stills needs...)

So, what God was asking me this morning was, "How much time are you willing to invest into being part of making it happen that my kingdom can come?"
And He didn't mean running around, being busy doing something for Him.

I think His question for YOU today is, "Are you willing to just seek my face? Are you willing for me to come at my time and put something on your heart?"

Well, I am not exactly what you call patient. So when God doesn't speak within about two minutes after I started praying, then I'll do. And by doing so I often just miss what is on His heart and am instead babbling about what is on mine. But don't get me wrong here: God loves to hear what's on our hearts. We just need to watch out that we don't become self-centred, feeling righteous at the same time.

Well... at least I have to.